Day 26 - Stop Wining

I ate out twice today. Mexican for lunch and Italian for dinner. Don’t know why, didn’t have any plans to do that, but it doesn’t matter. The friend I ate with for lunch suggested that all we ate was a big plate of sodium. He has a dietician who told him that he takes in too much salt, and to compensate he needs to drink a small inland lake every day. Perhaps that’s why I downed 9 glasses of water today. I was dried up like an old fart. Couldn’t get enough.

The tough part today was that I refused to drink any alcohol. Living consciously has made me aware of my excess, and most of the time it’s just not required, with the exception of vacation and parties. But sitting in an Italian restaurant, ordering and eating all that big food requires some good red wine. This is how I grew up. It’s reminiscent of all those holidays and parties we had at my Grandparents house. Nothing would taste better in that environment than a good deep red velvety wine. Nope, I resist. I’ve got more social, big party days coming up this weekend. Need to give the liver a break. It wasn’t easy either with my wife sitting there sipping on her Pinot Noir, “oh my gosh is this good, you should get one, wanna sip, just a try it, it’s really good...just a sip?” I then had to clue her into my conscious. Turns out communication and relationships work better that way. She’s not living consciously yet, so I forgive her.

Day 26

• 199!
• 3 cups of coffee
• 9 glasses of water
• 2 pork and onion enchiladas
• rice and beans
• several chips and salsa
• 1 cup of Italian wedding soup
• 3 pieces of Italian bread dipped in extra virgin olive oil and balsamic vinegar
• 1 serving of eggplant parmesan
• ½ serving of noodles and red sauce
  

• 35 pushups
• 35 sit-ups

Day 25 - Groundhog Day

Not unlike Day 23, after a long day of partying, very tired, uninspired, and unmotivated. The only thing keeping me going is that it’s Day 25. The weigh-in is right around the corner. Not hungry today either, most likely from the extra consumption from the day prior.

Nothing much else to report. A lazy day that didn’t see my activities begin until much late in the day. Since I stepped up the number of pushups and sit-ups I’ve been doing on Day 22, I’ve started to feel fatigued. Not sore, just fatigued, like I can barely get them done. So, on groundhog day, I lax that requirement. This plan shouldn’t be too strenuous.

Day 25

• 199!
• 1 bowl of cornflakes with milk
• 4 cups of coffee
• 5 glasses of water
• 1 Quizno’s regular beef brisket sub on wheat
• 1 plate of mashed potatoes and cream tuna fish
• 1 dinner salad
  

• 25 pushups
• 20 sit-ups

Day 24 - Ugh

Golfed 27 holes today, starting at 9:30a.m. We were rained on most of the day. I’m thinking I drink too much. Another long marathon day full of booze. That can’t be good. Although I did wake up early to get in my activities, that’s never happened before. But, the habits from the days of living fat and happy seem to keep creeping in. Change is slow, but I’m sticking to the plan. Small incremental improvement towards a larger goal is the key.

I carry my notepad with me in my golf bag. If this plan can work through all of my extraneous activities, then it can work for anyone. There is never a perfect time to start, there’s always something that is in the way. Just bull through, do all the steps every day, and it will happen. You have a better chance at getting results from taking action, no matter how small. Nobody ever got anywhere by doing nothing, except maybe fat and happy.

Day 24

• 199!
• a bowl of corn flakes with milk
• 4 cups of coffee
• 3 glasses of water
• 1000mg Vitamin C
• 6 Heineken beers
• 5 cocktails
• 2 glasses of wine
• a brat with potato chips
• 1 queen filet mignon (cooked to perfection. mmph!)
• vegetable medley (beans, carrots, red peppers)
• garlic mashed potatoes
• brownie covered in fudge sauce
• scoop of ice cream covered in fudge sauce
  

• 35 pushups
• 30 sit-ups

Day 23 - Recover

Being quite tired and groggy all day made it difficult to get the activities in, but am feeling good that I did something. Incidentally, ever since I moved away from 25 pushups and sit-ups, I’ve been breaking them down into repetitions. So the first set will be 20, then the next set will be 15. The weightlifting days in high school are coming back to me now. I don’t want to get too hung up here, it still only takes me minutes to complete and that’s all I should need right now anyway.

Tomorrow, a big golf outing. Usually, hard to stay away from beverages and tomorrow won’t be an exception. But, I’ve made it through a week long vacation and several parties on this plan, so one more day of fun isn’t going to detract me. Plus, this plan is so easy anyway, there’s really nothing for me to fret about. Day 23 and counting the days ‘til the finish line.

Day 23

199!

• 2 cups of coffee
• 5 glasses of water
• ½ piece of toast with butter
• 1000mg Vitamin C
• 1 large bowl of fruit salad
• 2 pieces of pepperoni pizza
• 2 swiss cheese cubes (store sample)
• 1 mozzarella and prosciutto slice (store sample)
• 1 bowl of cheesy potatoes with a fried egg on top
• 1 sour bom-pop
• 1 roast beef sandwich
• 3 handfuls of sunflower seeds
  

• 35 pushups
• 30 sit-ups

Day 22 - Deal Madness

Throwing a party for your kids birthday can be maddening. Everyone asking you where the soda is, where the cups are, what they can do with a half eaten plate of cake and melted ice cream, setting up the play station for all of the boys with A.D.D., getting another busy box ready when they tire of that, asking if it’s ok to go upstairs and play hide and seek, kiddies traipsing mud through the house... it can get frantic at times. In addition, all the food and drink is hard to pass up. But, I have brats to cook, people to feed. This ends up being more of a drink day than a food day. It all starts and ends in a flurry.

A bunch of family you haven’t seen in a while is a good test to see if you look any different than the last party. Given the couple of comments I’ve been getting around town about how I look different, I use this as the real test. Family is good at telling you the truth, if you look fat, old, gray whatever. I have cousins that are extremely good at telling you all the bad stuff. Every time we see them, someone tells us we look husky, bigger, different, older, or just plain fat.

All day, no comments from the family. I even explain the plan I’m on, tell them I’m on Day 22....nothing. So, to all you liars that said I look like I’m losing weight....you’re full of crap. In the end it’s not at the heart of the plan anyway. At the core of this program is the self-discipline that I need. Whether or not self-discipline is a learned behavior is in question. Despite the poundage, self-discipline will eventually win out over no self control. The mass loss is the result of the process of continual, daily, incremental improvement. I do believe it will work, however. In fact, I’m almost there. Oh, and before you check my into Betty Ford, this was a 12 hour process. Or is that denial? During my review last night, it was fairly apparent that I was over served. But that’s another 30 day plan not invented yet. Day 22, party day, below:

Day 22

• 199!
• 3 cups of coffee
• 9 glasses of water
• 1 ham sandwich on a kaiser roll
• 4 red wines
• 1 sip of a very dirty martini
• 1 brat with onions
• 1 serving of cheesy potatoes
• 1 serving of caesar salad
• 4 Oktoberfest beers
• 3 brandy rocks
• 1 beef sandwich on a kaiser roll
  

• 35 pushups
• 30 sit-ups

Day 21 - Older Bitches Rule

I test drove Bailey today. Man, what a difference. The old girl knows how to walk. By my side the entire time. A foot or more of slack in the leash. Never getting hung up in my steps. If she were the slightest bit ahead of me, the most gentle tug on the leash would rein her back in. No crapping, no smelling, no eating poop, bugs, grasshoppers, dried up worms on the sidewalk. It was like the first time I drove in a Cadillac as a kid. I knew I was in something special, the suspension made you feel like you were floating down the road. No hard bumps, no worries. Just smooth sailing. She had a lot in the tank, she could easily go longer than the two mile track. She could of easily outpaced me, but had a controlled regal trot. What a great walking dog. Apparently, there is something to this dog training thing after all.

I’m not going to rip on Vern too much. He still is less than two years old, and he just got his sack cut off. He’s just not much of a walker is all. I’ll swap days between Vern and Bailey now. I’ll use Vern on my light days, and Bailey when I want to stretch it out. Vern was looking at me funny today as I walked past him with Bailey. “Why you cheatin’ on me like that?” I’ll talk with him later.

Not a huge food day. Just wasn’t hungry all day, so I didn’t eat much. Nothing else to it. Could be a case of the snickerdoodle the night before, who knows? Then the party started. Later in the day I was at a great party, lots of wine, tons of good heavy food, lasagna, stuffed shells, chicken, garlic bread, antipasto salads. Time to put the feed bag on. Since I wasn’t interested in my usual grazing ritual, I saved myself for the main meal. No heavy stomach feeling or any discomfort afterwards. Maybe I’m figuring this out.

Update from the Poop Lady, the one who fed me poop tea. She was surprised to learn that the poop tea caused me so much discomfort. She thinks she may have steered me wrong. She told me to steep the tea bag for at least ten minutes to get a better effect. However, the instructions on the package state that you should really ease into it, starting with three minutes, then moving up to five minutes etc. Perhaps another trial run with poop tea is in order, steeping it for only three minutes. We shall see.

Day 21

• 199!
• 2 cups of coffee
• 4 glasses of water
• 1 glass of milk
• 1000mg of Vitamin C
• 2 pieces of sour apple Trident gum
• 1 cube of extra sharp cheddar (store sampler, tee hee)
• 1 slice of Monterey jack cheese (tee hee)
• 1 brat with onions and mustard
• 1 Molson Canadian beer
• 4 ½ glasses of red wine
• 1 whiskey manhattan
• 1 piece and 1 bite of garlic bread
• 2 stuffed shells (smothered in red sauce and grated cheese)
• 1 serving of antipasto salad
• 1 square of lasagna (smothered in red sauce and grated cheese)
  

• 25 pushups
• 25 sit-ups
• 2 mile walk with Bailey

Day 20 - Jumping Rope Is Not Child's Play

So my wife told me a few days ago that jumping rope is really good for you. She was wrong. I felt completely horrible afterwards. It only lasted a few minutes. Since Day 20 brought rain and thunderstorms and I can’t test out my new walking dog, I decided to jump rope. Sounded simple enough, but I would definitely consult a doctor before trying this yourself. Unless of course, you start really small, like 10 times. Just like the pushups and sit-ups I’ve been doing. I didn’t start with 25 each, nor should I have when you consider how pathetically out of shape I was. A slow incremental build with what your body feels comfortable with. Doing small activities daily until your body tells you to take the next step. Well, I didn’t listen to my own advice with the jump rope. I’m still breathing heavy just thinking about it.

After a light McDonald’s snack, I’ve got a stomach ache. While it tasted good it left me feeling full and icky. I can’t overstate how full I feel after the seemingly small intake, it’s amazing to me. I had a few other chances to stuff my pie hole with other items, but I resisted. Mostly, because my notepad wasn’t handy and I’d have to remember everything. Secondly, because I wasn’t hungry anyway. When I’m hungry I eat, but now it’s not as much as I used to eat.

Day 20

• 199!
• 4 cups of coffee
• 1 Altoid
• 4 chicken McNuggets w/ bbq sauce
• 10 french fries (of varying length) w/ bbq sauce
• 5 glasses of water
• 1 slice of cantaloupe
• 1 bunch of grapes
• 1000mg Vitamin C
• 1 granny smith apple
• 2 handfuls of pretzels with horseradish mustard for dipping
• 1 Schlitz beer
• ½ homemade egg mcmuffin (yum yum)
• 1 plate of buttered noodles
• 2 gin and tonics
• 1 snickerdoodle*
  

• 25 pushups
• 25 sit-ups
• jumped rope 100 times (4 reps x 25 or so)
• played 500 in the street

* apparently some German creation. A buttery cookie with cinnamon sprinkled on the top. Very tasty, which is surprising for German fodder. Usually German food has a dumb name and no flavor, this just has the dumb name. Nobody could help me with the spelling.

Day 19 - Resist The Weigh-In

I was able to get Vern back on the program and we did our original short track of 2 miles. He only laid down once, and attempted to lay down one other time before I stopped him. I instructed his owners that they may want to take him in and get his heart checked out. Makes me wonder if they have a doggy EKG machine. In addition, I’ve recruited another older medium size dog from across the street. Her name is Bailey. They tell me she doesn’t crap or tinkle on the walk, only before and after, and just sticks by your side. She’s not all over the place smelling every mail box post and getting tangled up around every small tree. I think I need to put Vern back on the shelf every once and a while. Looking forward to testing her out.

A meager eating day, but I wasn’t bloated at all, and when I felt hungry, I ate something, albeit nothing special. Fairly simple. One more mention from someone today saying, “it looks like you might be losing weight, and I ain’t checkin’ you out dude.” So, I’ve had the urge to weigh myself based on those comments. Could it be true? Am I really dropping some weight here, how much? 2lbs, 5lbs, 10lbs? It’s simple to find out, nobody would have to know. NOPE! That’s not the plan, so I resist it. The plan is about learning self-discipline and control, living consciously, and as a result feeling healthier and losing weight. Without the former, you certainly don’t get the latter. So, focusing on the former, here’s Day 19. Fairly close to the big 10 day countdown.

Day 19

• 199!
• ¾ pot of coffee
• 1 slice of wheat toast with butter and peanut butter
• 2 sausage links
• 1 scoop of hash browns with American cheese
• 5 glasses of water
• 1000mg of Vitamin C
• 4 bites of a pear (too mealy, yuck)
• 2 handfuls of mini twist pretzels
• 2 gin and tonics with a lime
• 1 turkey on wheat with cheese and mayo
  

• 25 pushups
• 25 sit-ups
• 2 mile walk with Vern

Day 18 - Where's the Wagon?

A couple things worth noting today. First of all, no alcohol. In the words of Forest Gump, ...”that’s all I have to say ‘bout dat.”

Secondly, after my Rueben sandwich lunch and my somewhat meager dinner, I had tremendous gut ache, an ate too much Thanksgiving meal feeling. I don’t know why exactly but another friend reminded me of the stomach shrinkage phenomenon. There either is something to that, or something else is going on deep inside.

An the activity side of things, a word to the wise, don’t get ahead of yourself. By now you should be feeling pretty confident that you can see this plan through to the end. No big deal there right? After all, it’s all downhill from here. But, don’t get overconfident. Playing football in the street sounds easy and simple enough, however, it’s easy to get caught up in how you performed when you were younger. Don’t do that. One quick sprint downfield to catch a ball and afterwards I was immediately out of breath gasping for air, and then started sweating. After that, I took it slower, didn’t really exert myself as hard and life was good. Since I started sweating, I certainly can count it as an activity. It was about 20 minutes worth. Just remember that you are pathetic with no self-discipline like me. You’ve been living Fat and Happy for a long time, and it’s going to take longer to get back to the days of old, in fact you may never get there, simply because you’re aging as well. If you’ve been following the plan, you’re less pathetic than you once were, but it’s not over yet. Take it slow. Then your groin won’t hurt like mine.

Day 18

• 199!
• 4 cups of coffee
• 7 glasses of water
• 21 cherries
• 1 piece of wheat toast with butter and peanut butter (yum yum)
• 1 large Rueben with horseradish
• 1 side of coleslaw
• 2 slices of pickle
• 6 Altoids
• 2 pieces of Trident apple fusion gum
• 1 roasted chicken breast (smothered in gravy)
• 1 serving of green beans (smothered in gravy)
• 1 serving of mashed potatoes (smothered in gravy)
• 4 handfuls of sunflower seeds
• 1 large glass of orange juice
  

• 25 pushups
• 25 sit-ups
• played football in the street

Day 17 - Hitting Stride

I finally wake up without feeling bloated. I hear from more than one person reading this that I don’t eat much. I know I was eating more in the first couple of days, it was pretty pathetic. That coupled with all of the “empty calories,” could be why I was so fat and happy. Even though I’ve dialed my solid consumption back a touch, I still don’t feel hungry. I’ve heard your metabolism slows as you age, so I probably don’t need that much to begin with. Is it true that your stomach can really shrink? I find that hard to believe. I know of only one body part that can grow and shrink. Regardless, it is what it is.

Keep in mind, I’ve been eating and drinking anything I please. So that part isn’t different from the Fat and Happy Plan. The difference is that I’m eating and living consciously, aware of how much I stuff in, and able to reject bad choices when I really don’t need it. When I was living unconsciously, I didn’t know, it just went in.

This plan is easy for me. I have my notepad with me most of the time. I’m seeking new opportunities to do activities. Today, I needed to go to the bank. I thought I’d kill two birds with one stone and walk my buddy Vern. Guessing, this is certainly a longer route than our standard two miler, but I’m feeling up to it and the worst case is I call my neighbor to pick us up if I’m feeling fatigued.

After I walk Vern to the bank and we go through the drive thru (didn’t think the bank would appreciate Vern in their nice lobby), Vern starts panting and dogging it a bit. On the way back home, he stops in the shade to lay down and rest at least 8 times. After some quick coaxing he’s back up and walking with his tongue hanging out looking longer than ever. I’m feeling good, I feel like this is nothing for me, even though I’m sweating just a tad. It’s that feeling like you had when you were a kid running around with your friends like you could go forever. No pain, just moving. I’m hitting my stride. I feel like I’m kicking Vern’s butt on this jaunt. Vern is a little dog, a Cairn Terrier, so I don’t think he’s in the working dog group as listed by the American Kennel Club. But, I’m feeling like he should be able to walk a distance without passing out. Perhaps I need a new neighbor dog to walk.

Day 17

• 199!
• 5 cups of coffee
• 4 glasses of water
• 1” cube of pound cake (free sample at Starbuck’s)
• 1 mixed berry Yoplait yogurt
• 3 handfuls of sunflower seeds
• 1 Swanson frozen macaroni n’ cheese
• 1/3 pint of blueberries
• 1 turkey sandwich on wheat with mayo
• 1 glass of milk
• 4 Coors light beers
• 1 ½ pieces of fried chicken strips
  

• 25 pushups
• 3 mile walk with Vern
• Football*
• Wiffle-Ball**

* just running routes and goofing around in the street. I did sweat however.

** you’d be amazed at how you can sweat doing this, I’m counting it.

Day 16 - Back to Life

My first full day back from vacation. Still feeling tired. Committed to the program, I forge ahead. Since we don’t have a bunch of food in the house, I scrounge around.

Later that day we get a call from my wife’s cousin. He asks us to go sailing for an hour or so with the kids. Having not done this before, I see it as an opportunity to introduce myself and the kids to something new. After it was over, I realize that it was worthy of an activity, it needed to be logged.

If you didn’t know this previously, the reason people ask you to go sailing with them isn’t because they like your company, it’s because it’s a bunch of work. It requires more than themselves to manage the process, and you’re it. They boss you around, ask you to pull on a bunch of rope, fold sails, make sure you keep it going in a certain direction, and duck when the boom swings over. There are parts of it that are relaxing, when everything is finally setup and you’re actually sailing. The rest of it is just plain old work. It’s like cooking for 20 people over an open campfire, not exactly easy to do or straightforward. It made me appreciate motors. Day 16, below deck:

Day 16

• 199!
• 5 cups of coffee
• 2 egg omelet with cheddar cheese
• 1000mg Vitamin C tablets
• 5 glasses of water
• 5 spoonfuls of macaroni n’ cheese
• 3 cherries
• 10 olives
• 4 beers
• 5 chips and artichoke dip
• 1 cheeseburger with fried onions
• 4 handfuls of sunflower seeds

• 20 sit ups
• 25 pushups
• 2 mile walk with Vern
• 2 hours of sailing

Day 15 - Halfway Home

The day finds me tired from vacation and having to pack up all of my families belongings to go home before 9am. I’m feeling bloated from the previous two nights big steak dinners, and heavy consumption. I don’t feel any lighter or better in shape, but I get two compliments on my arrival back home that “I look thinner.” I think this is all a crock, but I’ll use this as extra motivation to continue on the program for the full 30 days. After all, I’m halfway home. I don’t think I’ve ever done anything in a row for 15 straight days. This in itself is an accomplishment.

Thankfully after the drive home, my neighbors received us with a pizza party. Unfortunately, I was inspired to have more “empty calories.” If those are really bad for a diet, then I guess we’ll find out how bad they are when I weigh myself at the end of the program. I’m guessing that it’s all a myth, but we’ll see. Milestone Day 15 is as follows:

Day 15

• 199!
• 4 cups of coffee
• 2 glasses of water
• 3 egg omelet with Canadian bacon, onions, covered with hollandaise sauce
• 1 piece of English muffin toast with butter
• 1 large hash browns
• 3 handfuls of sunflower seeds
• 1 string cheese
• 5 beers
• 2 pieces of pizza
• 2 mozzarella sticks dipped in red sauce
• 1 handful of honey glazed peanuts

• 25 pushups

Day 10 thru Day 14 - The Grind

Unfortunately, having no internet connection up in the north woods of Wisconsin has left me with a bunch of catching up to do regarding my posts to this blog. To wit, I’ve consolidated a bunch of the daily logs. This truly has been a bit of a grind, not only has the initial excitement wore off but I have to continue to do the plan over vacation. However, if I can accomplish the goals set forth in the plan and be successful with a 7 day vacation thrown in the middle, that would be saying something. Then I’d be left to imagine how much more effective this plan would be if it didn’t include 7 days of relaxation.

On any vacation, there’s many activities outside of the normal daily ritual. There’s certainly no shortage of things to do, but I’ve logged only the more abnormal items here. I could include, walking up and down a big honking hill 10 times a day to my cabin and the lake, pulling kids in an inner tube all day around the lake, but I won’t. Despite the fact that this plan is more activity based than exercise based. It’s about getting your body moving, doing something other than nothing, sitting around or whatever. I originally thought that I’d have to go walking every day or something, but the days are all jam packed with activities. It’s been easier than I thought. The rest of vacation logs are as follows:

Day 10

• 199!
• 3 cups of coffee
• 3 glasses of water
• 1000 mg Vitamin C tablets
• 2 ½ pieces of English muffin toast with butter
• 7 baby carrots
• 1 grilled grouper sandwich
• 1 small potato salad
• 1 pickle
• 1 mint
• 2 walleye fingers (like fish sticks)
• 3 fried cheese curds
• 5 crackers and beef dip
• wine
• cocktails

• 20 pushups
• horseback riding

Day 11

• 199!
• 1 cup of coffee
• 5 glasses of water
• 3 hard boiled eggs
• 1 blueberry nutri-grain bar
• 1000mg Vitamin C tablets
• 2 pickles
• 1 cheeseburger
• 1 Italian sausage
• 6 black olives
• 1 slice of beef summer sausage
• 7 Ritz crackers
• beers
• cocktails

• golf (riding in a cart)
• 1 hour of wiffle ball

Day 12

• 199!
• 1000mg Vitamin C tablets
• 4 cups of coffee
• 2 glasses of water
• scrambled eggs with cheddar cheese and leftover Italian sausage
• cheesy potatoes
• 1 blueberry pancake
• 6 cashews
• 2 slices of cheese and sausage
• 3 pieces of pizza
• 3 jalapeno poppers
• beer
• wine
• cocktails

• 25 pushups
• light swim

Day 13

• 199!
• 3 cups of coffee
• 1 glass of water
• 1 hard boiled egg
• 1 slice of pizza
• 2 slices of apple
• 5 slices of cheese and crackers
• 1 snack size bag of sour cream and onion potato chips
• 2 slices of grilled beef tenderloin with grilled onions and mushrooms
• 1 baked potato
• 1 bowl of Caesar salad
• beer
• wine
• cocktails

• 20 pushups

Day 14

• 199!
• 7 cups of coffee
• 3 glasses of water
• 2 soft boiled eggs
• 6 pieces of bacon
• 1 English muffin toast
• 3 slices of cheese and crackers
• 2 slices of grilled beef tenderloin with blue cheese, garlic, and sautéed onions
• 1 serving of diced potatoes
• 1 piece of garlic bread
• 1 bowl of Caesar salad
• wine
• cocktails

• 25 pushups
• light swim

Day 9 - Cheese Please

These are the dog days. I need to get through this vacation and see the light at the end of the tunnel. Doing the plan isn’t hard each day, but I wish I was closer. I’ll continue to grind it out. Self-discipline, incremental improvement, and weight loss as a result, is the goal.

Being on vacation sometimes isn’t restful. Getting the boat from the rental place, going into town to run errands, inner tubes, bait, food, water, ice, etc. etc. This isn’t a part of the normal routine, but it’s good, keeps you moving. And, apparently I like cheese. Day 9 below:

Day 9

• 199!
• 2 cups of coffee
• 3 glasses of water
• 1 serving hash browns with American cheese
• 1 sausage
• 2 soft boiled eggs
• ½ wheat toast with butter
• 1 scrambled egg with cheddar cheese
• ½ braeburn apple
• 1000 mg Vitamin C tablets
• 2 handfuls of sunflower seeds
• cocktails
• beers
• 1 beef sandwich with American cheese
• 2 roasted corn on the cobs
• 1 helping of cheesy potatoes
• 1 slice of watermelon
• a few potato chips

• 20 pushups
• a light swim in the lake (about 5-8 minutes)

Day 8 - Empty Calories?

It was a tough day to get everything in because of the travel schedule. This plan is so easy that even on days like this, I can accomplish my goal. Feeling a wee bit bloated from the other night. Doesn’t feel like I’m making progress, but I am, simply because I’m doing a little bit each day towards a goal.

It’s pretty apparent that I like to imbibe. Everyone tells me that it’s no good for a diet, “those are empty calories” they say, whatever that means. Being that the next several days are over a vacation with family and friends, I’m going to go easy on myself. For the duration of the trip, I’m no longer going to count off each of the spirits I consume, but rather be more generic about the quantities. Vacation is a time to relax. There should be no guilt on this plan, and that’s that.

The Day 8 also finds me very active with the packing/unpacking, but I’m not going to count that. There’s plenty of other types of activities to do in the north woods. The Day 8 log is as follows:

Day 8

• 199!
• 4 cups of coffee
• 5 glasses of water
• several handfuls of sunflower seeds
• 1 6” turkey sub on wheat from Subway
• beers
• cocktails
• wine with dinner
• 1½ jamaican jerk grilled pork chops
• ½ baked potato with cheese and sour cream
• 1 handful of potato chips

• road a hydro-bike*

* this is a bike that sits on top of two pontoons in the water. When you pedal a propeller rotates in the back and pushes you along.

Day 7 - Roll Call

Well, it’s the day before I leave for vacation and it’s pretty hard to focus on me. I’ve got things to pack, people to see, loose ends to tie up, etc. It’s not that easy being me right now. Regardless, I’m committed to this plan and the work it takes. I spent the evening at a going away party for a young man that committed himself to the military. If it took me being there all night to show support for what he was embarking on, I would of been there ‘til the sun came up. He’s got a bigger satchel than most of the old men at your local athletic club. Yeah, if you were on a normal diet program, you would call this a cheatin’ day, but not me. It is, what it is. Here’s to you Jimmy, and here’s my day :

Day 7

• 199!
• ½ pot of coffee
• 4 glasses of water
• 1 Thai style crab cake
• 1 cucumber grilled shrimp salad
• 5 Altoids
• 1 Braeburn apple
• 1 Vitamin C 500mg tablet
• 2 Paulaner Octoberfest
• 1 soft beef taco
• 2 hard shell beef taco’s
• 1 Molson Canadian
• 5 tap beers
• 1 vodka martini
• 1 italian sausage sandwich
• 6 blueberries
• 2 italian cookies
• 6 bread/rolls*

• 2 mile walk with Vern
• 20 pushups
• 20 sit-ups

* It was a feast of feasts. I call them Daigo donuts. Extra bread rolls hanging around during a card game that come from a local Italian bakery...mmmmm...

Day 6 - Macho Camacho

At one point today I had more on my activity list than I did my mouth intake list. My back held up well. That’s never happened before. I was feeling good all day, and progressively felt like I could do more as the day wore on. Well except when I woke up....poop tea isn’t in the cards for me. It might work for some people, but not me. Too bad, it’s the only tea that really tasted good to me. Turns out the person that gave it to me has some Constantinople issues, if you know what I mean. So I’m sure the tea helps in that regard. Good to know beforehand I suppose.

Day 6 didn’t feel like a dog day, it felt like a strong day, wasn’t hungry and wasn’t trying to avoid food. The day wore on and I was too busy to notice. When I had a chance to eat, I kept it light and felt pleasantly full afterwards. Amazing. This despite the fact that I played cards until the wee hours. Usually, that’s a booze and food fest. I think I kept it under control, without any remorse or guilt. Almost like the days of the fat and happy plan. Sure, I had my fill, but since it was a good day, none of that phased me. You can still do anything you want on this plan, but your daily log and review puts you in control. This makes me feel good about going on vacation for a week right smack dab in the middle of this 30 day effort.

This isn’t about weight day to day. I probably gained weight after the days events because of all the beer I consumed. If I weighed myself every day for 30 days it would go up and down the entire time. On the down days I would feel great, on the up days I would feel pathetic. All of those feelings are misguided. Airplanes are off course 99% of the time but they always reach the right destination. An airplanes computer system is constantly checking and correcting it’s behavior but the pilot really never feels it. It’s probably too much to deal with. He’s in control of the bigger goal. This is about weighing yourself before you board the plane, and weighing yourself when you land only. Don’t deal with the day to day weigh-ins, they can't tell you where you are headed at any point in time. The feelings you get are misguided and it’s not worth it.

Day 6

• 199!
• ¾ pot of coffee
• 3 glasses of water
• 1 Vitamin C tablet
• 1 hard boiled egg
• 1 bowl of chicken salad
• 3 Altoids
• 1 banana
• 1 peanut butter stuffed Keebler cookie
• 1 apple/cinnamon Nutri-grain bar
• 1 braeburn apple
• 1 dozen pretzels
• Several handfuls of sunflower seeds (the kind where you spit out shells)
• 3 string cheese
• 4 Coors beers
• 1 Miller Lite beer
• 2 Guinness beers
• 2 Molson Canadian beers
• (sidenote: all beer was consumed over an 8 hour interval)

• 20 pushups
• 10 leg lifts
• 3 reps of holding my legs out at 15 seconds each
• cut neighbors lawn*
• walked Vern (2 miles)
• biked 2 miles (7 minutes 44 seconds)**

* I’m cutting his when he’s gone on vacation, and he’ll return the favor next week when I’m on vacation.

** while the boys were sitting outside in the hood, a gentle challenge was issued to complete the Vern 2 mile dog walking track on a bike, in 10 minutes or less. Bang! I may end up paying for this. Too strenuous.

Day 5 - The Morning After

Well the day didn’t start out too hot, as I woke up at 6 am with cramps in the lower abdomen. The only trouble is I don’t know whether to blame the poop tea or the Schlitz beer. The neighbor that gave me a sample of the poop tea, swore by it’s effective and comfortable cleansing ability. Perhaps it just doesn’t agree with me, or perhaps it’s all about piling a Schlitz beer on top of four Guinness’s, or some combination of both. Regardless, I don’t give up that easy, and I have one sample poop tea bag left. I’m gonna give it another shot, as the promise of a morning ritual that includes a comfortable cleansing sounds too good to pass up. Plus, the tea actually tasted really good.

On the muscular and skeletal side of things, if my gooness wasn’t motivation enough, I hurt my back this morning bending over to kiss my kids goodbye. Granted, I’ve been struggling with a back problem on and off for a decade, but it flares up from time to time when it doesn’t agree with a certain move I put on it. This could include putting on a sandal, sock, or shoe, dancing funny, walking down the stairs and missing a step, throwing awkward, jogging, playing golf in a riding cart and getting out of a car. I’ve seen a chiropractor for this and he’s really got only one thing to say to me...”you have to lose your gut and get in shape.” Well, I’ve tried a few times and it just doesn’t stick, that’s why I gave it up. But, all things considered, this is a good reminder that I need to succeed on this 30 day plan.

Today, I think I made good eating choices. However, it’s 8:40 at night and I’m starving. I haven’t felt really hungry on this plan yet until now. Hopefully, the poop tea will help me out here. Eating lunch and dinner today, I felt full even though I didn’t eat that much. Almost like my stomach capacity isn’t what it used to be. I find it hard to believe since it’s only day 5.

It’s important to note that this plan isn’t about fasting either, it’s about making better choices. Choices based on the fact that your daily log has shown you how pathetic you are, you want to change, you need to change, and now you have a framework for living that change and sticking to it, thereby disciplining yourself. Coach John Wooden said something like, “discipline yourself and others won’t have to.” Well that’s exactly what this is about. Slowly, daily, small incremental improvement, until it becomes habit forming and you can’t stop yourself. Just like brushing your teeth, you have to do it, you can’t not do it at least once a day. As you start to accumulate these small daily wins, your outlook will change from hopeless to hopeful. Some people seem born disciplined, and guys like me just don’t get it. I’m curious if self-discipline can be learned. After day 5, I certainly feel less pathetic, despite my morning cramping and my bad back. Day 5 log is as follows:

Day 5

• 199!
• 1 venti (large) coffee from Starbucks
• 1 cup of coffee from work (yuk)
• 6 20oz bottles of water (taking some advice to heart I guess)
• 1 6-8” hot roast beef sub with melted provolone cheese and gardinara
• 1 small Solo cup of au jus on the side
• 6 sprigs of cooked broccoli
• 3 slices of pork tenderloin
• 1 small serving of buttered noodles drizzled with Romano cheese (stolen from kids)
• 1 cup of poop tea
• 
  
• 16 pushups
• 16 leg lifts
• cut and raked lawn*

*cutting the lawn is a regular activity but raking isn’t. I lowered the deck a notch and raked up all the excess. Not because I needed something to do, but it was a good excuse nonetheless.

Day 4 - A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

I think I’ve been able to tame my grazing eating habits again today by just a tad. No real hunger pains to report either. In addition, I’ve rallied some support from the neighborhood. I think this plan needs a new rule. I believe as you live through this, you need support. So the new rule is, you need to tell as many people about what you’re doing as possible. I told them my weight when I started, the plan I’m on, everything.

People love to help people. Even if it is to simply give them an opinion. You’re pathetic just like me, which is why you’re reading this. You have no self-discipline in your life, and you know nothing about getting in shape or good eating habits. You’ve been living by common sense, but you need more to lose weight and get in shape. You need a support group around you that can lend you some pointers. For instance, today I’ve got the following help (paraphrasing);

“You should really be drinking six to eight glasses of water a day.”

“Your body takes on toxins and you need to get rid of them, here have some tea that will help you poop in the morning, ridding your body of all that bad stuff. Then you’ll weigh less.”

“You wanna take our dog for a walk?”

In addition, as you tell more and more people, you feel a sense of obligation not to let them down. It’s not just you anymore, cheating yourself. Imagine what it would be like to see them tomorrow and have them ask you how it’s going and all you have in return is, “yeah, it’s not working out so hot....” because you couldn’t complete one of the cinchy steps that take no time at all per day. That would bite. Your support system is there to help lift you up after the initial excitement wears off. Right now, I’m still figuring this thing out so I’m still in the honeymoon phase. During the dog days (most likely Day 7 – Day 20), I’ll probably need to rely on them more and more. Just a hunch.

My exercise program has taken a turn to the upside. Not only did I notch another pushup and leg lift onto my program, but I also ended up walking the neighbors dog. I’m thinking that my measly exercise program will need to keep notching up higher, bit by bit to help me along. Nothing too strenuous, don’t want to feel pain. But if I can do it, I should at least try. The Day 4 tale of the tape is as follows:

Day 4

• 199!
• ¾ pot of coffee
• 1 piece of Italian bread toast with real butter
• 3 glasses of water
• 1 ham and cheese on honey wheat bread with mayo
• 1 Vitamin C tablet
• 1 handful of sunflower seeds (the kind with the shells you spit)
• 13 cherries (the kind with the pit. Makes for easy counting when you’re all done)
• 4 Guinness beers
• 1 Schlitz beer
• 4 fried in beer batter salmon strips
• 1 serving of french fries
• 1 piece of Vienna bread with real butter
• 2 Jugy fruits (what a waste)
• 1 cup of poop tea
• 16 pushups
• 16 leg lifts
• 40 minute walk with Vern*

*Vern is the neighbors dog